Unveiling Layers of Reflection: An Interview with Gemma Felicity on ‘AM I TOXIC’ and the ‘Baggage’ EP

In our conversation with Gemma Felicity, we sink into the introspective depths of her recent single ‘AM I TOXIC’ and the overarching themes within her emotionally charged EP ‘Baggage’. Gemma opens up about the process of creating music that not only reflects personal accountability but also challenges the listener to confront their own roles in relationships. With her raw and reflective approach, she reveals how personal experiences have fuelled her songwriting, transforming pain into powerful lyrical narratives. 

Welcome to A&R Factory, Gemma! Thanks for sitting down with us to discuss your latest single, ‘AM I TOXIC’, and the incredible work you’ve been doing with your EP ‘Baggage’. AM I TOXIC is such a powerfully candid tour de force which brings to light how accountability is such a scarcity in relationships and much of life. How did it feel to bring such an intense track to fruition?

Yes, it is so true that accountability can be so rare nowadays, in relationships and in life generally. Many people prefer to put the blame on others so that they do not have to look at themselves and take responsibility for their own behaviours and actions. I think I am quite an intense person and I think deeply about things, so I didn’t even realise it was an intense track. But thank you! And I feel proud to have brought this track into the world, as it has come from such a personal place.

You’ve mentioned that much of your songwriting is self-reflective, and this track certainly showcases that. What was it like to collaborate with Alex Rossiter and Louis Takooree for this single, and how did they help bring your vision to life?

Both Alex and Louis are always amazing to work with. They are both the complete opposite to the type of men that I wrote the song about. I came up with the idea of the song back in January 2022, just after I had been ghosted by a guy who had treated me like a piece of crap for months. I was really upset about this, and thinking to myself, wondering why it was that I always got treated this way. I started to really ask myself why I thought this might be. Did I not think that I was worthy of more than this? I started to put it into a song. I didn’t finish the song, but I just left what I had written on my phone in a voice note for months and months.

I was then lucky enough to meet Alex, my guitarist, in June 2022 of that year. He asked me in around September 2022, if I would like to work on some of my original songs with him. So, we spent a couple of days writing together in a park, taking the clips I had recorded on my phone and turning them into full songs. I was so happy that he was helping me to finally bring my song ideas to life, as it was what I had wanted to do for so long.

When it came to AM I TOXIC, I remember him saying “This is such a banger”, and we made a full demo of it together at his place. He told me he knew the perfect person to work on it in the studio with me. He then introduced me to Louis, and Louis made the songs really pop in the studio. He was just the perfect person to bring it all to life. I am so happy with how AM I TOXIC turned out in particular. It was such a beautiful process of turning the song into what it is today, and I have the boys to thank for that.

How did you approach translating such an introspective song into a visual format for the official music video? 

I worked on the music video with an amazing team called Grizzly Productions. We first brainstormed ideas together – I knew I wanted it to be quite different to any of my previous music videos. I wanted this one to be more performance-based and visually very exciting, rather than storyline-based (which is what my previous music videos were like). I think the music video does a great job of making an extremely introspective song also very exciting and fun.

What led you to centre your EP around the theme of emotional weight being carried into relationships, and how did your personal experiences shape the stories told in each track?

I guess it was just something I was going through and struggling with at the time. I think relationships are great teachers for us, and they can reflect back to us things we need to learn about ourselves. Through every relationship I had, I would realise and learn more about myself, and I would always observe what the experience I had attracted, was teaching me about myself and how I felt within myself, and I found this very interesting. I started seeing a therapist and we worked through some of these issues, and that is when I started writing lots of music about it. I guess all the self-reflection gave me a lot of songwriting content.

You recently headlined at The Troubadour for the second time. How does performing your songs live compare to the process of writing and recording them, especially with such emotionally charged material?

I won’t lie, I find singing my songs live very challenging because they are so vulnerable and personal. As someone who is fairly introverted, I would say, I find it pretty uncomfortable to be so open about myself in front of a huge room of people like that. The songs can often make me feel quite emotional too when I am singing them. But I have learnt how to try to connect to the emotions of the song, whilst still slightly separating myself from the emotional charge that the song has on me naturally.

When I was writing and recording these songs, I let myself be as emotional as I wished to be. But performing is a bit of a different process, as you don’t want to start crying in front of the audience really, so you have to learn how to feel the emotion of the song without getting overly emotional. I find this challenging because I am a very emotional person.

You have started paving the path to international stardom this year with performances in the US and India, what did you take away from these experiences?

Thank you so much for saying that. The performances I did this year in the US and India were so amazing for my confidence in terms of performing and getting out of my comfort zone. The songs we sang in the performances were much more upbeat and party vibes compared to the original songs that I usually sing. It was a completely new vibe for me, and an amazing experience. We also had to dance and truly perform them confidently to the audience, which really put me out of my comfort zone but definitely has helped me to grow. I think you can’t really grow without a certain level of discomfort.

Your lyrics often explore vulnerability and complex emotions. How important is it for you to write from a place of raw honesty, and do you ever feel exposed putting such personal themes into your music?

Yes, I find it extremely difficult and very exposing writing about such personal themes. It is challenging, to say the least, and often feels way too vulnerable. But I always remind myself that there is beauty in vulnerability and expressing the things you don’t find easy to express. As a songwriter, your words will resonate with other people, and you have the ability to really comfort people and make them realise that they aren’t alone in all of life’s complexities. I think there is beauty in music that is so raw and real. I don’t really like superficial surface level music unfortunately – I always tend to go in at the deep end. Sometimes I really wish I could write about superficial stuff, as I wonder if I might be happier if I were to be more of a happy-go-lucky person. I’m a deep thinker though through and through.

Stream AM I TOXIC on Spotify now, and follow Gemma on Instagram.

Interview by Amelia Vandergast

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